An unholy power
by A Pretend Master Mind
Summary: When people who need better connection play videogames, this is the disaster that ensues.


An unholy power

The pitiful little wanderer clutched his scimitar as he felt something was amiss in the world. After hundreds of grievous injuries, and inhuman masochism, he had just defeated a huge Taurus Demon on a precarious wall. Waving goodbye to his old area, he stepped through a doorway into a tower. After intelligently obtaining a hidden item, he made his happy way down the stairs, eager to reach his next bonfire and make some progress. Suddenly and without warning, he heard a joyful voice calling out to him. He turned around to see a burly looking knight gazing into the sun. He had an image of the sun crudely painted on his chest.

"Hello there! My name is Solaire. You seem friendly enough. I have a proposition if you have a moment."

Of course the wanderer had all the time he needed. He was an undead, and he was on top of the world after he defeated that Taurus Demon. After hearing Solaire's proposition, he ended up receiving a strange white stone. It felt chalky, and it seemed to have a friendly look to it. Waving goodbye to another friend, he turned around and cheerfully made his way across the bridge, or he would have, if he wasn't rudely awoken from his daydream by a monstrous drake. Sensing the immediate danger, the now frightened wanderer spun around, and was almost completely roasted to death by fiery dragon breath. The wanderer was consumed in flames and screamed for help, but Solaire seemed not to notice. Maybe the sun roasted his brain, or maybe he was asleep.

The wanderer scrambled for his estus flask, tasting only one drop of estus before feeling the despair of emptiness. The wanderer slowly stood, and sifted through his items, looking for anything to help. Seeing his singular humanity, he realized he could use it to heal… but he hesitated as it was his only humanity. His survival instinct surviving over his miserly tendencies, he consumed the tiny black sprite, feeling energized and rejuvenated. Turning toward the dragon, he noticed that he only had one way out: he had to go down a small set of stairs located halfway across the bridge. Deciding it was then or never, he held up his leather shield and sprinted as fast as he could to the stairs. Several undead blocked his path, but he knew he had already run out of time.

Rolling down the stairs, the undead barely escaped the dragon blasting fire from above. Feeling the souls from the unfortunate undead above flow into him, he stood up and walked into the next room, noticing a ladder and his old bonfire. He kicked the ladder, opening a shortcut of epic proportions. It was time to rest.

While relaxing in the warmth of the bonfire, waiting to fill up his estus flask, he began examining the stone he received from Solaire. He vaguely remembered something about leaving a summon sign to help other undead. Being kind of bored, and not yet ready to make more progress, he decided to give it a try. Only moments after writing his name on the floor, he felt himself being pulled away from his world. He didn't know what was happening, and he was nervous but not afraid. He felt tired, and he fell backward as his vision faded to black.

"Oh thank the gods you're here!" A squeaky little pyromancer shouted in his face. Disoriented and confused the wanderer simply bowed. Shrugging as if it was some sort of formality, the pyromancer returned the bow. The wanderer looked around. This area was exactly the same as the one he had just been in, except he wasn't alone. The truly amazing thing was his glowing white ghostly skin. He guessed that the pyromancer had summoned him as a phantom, and that was why he was ghostly. The wanderer watched him press his hand down on a white summon sign on the ground. A white knight rose from the ground, and immediately waved happily. Suddenly there were three of them, and the squeaky voiced pyromancer, allowed his burly new buddies to smash the hollows for him. Realizing that he knew the exact layout of the area, the heroic wanderer quickly and efficiently brought his companion to the end of the area, right before the boss. To all three of the warriors' surprise, a dark rift opened up in front of the door. Everyone stepped back, fearing the worst. The same thought passed through all of their minds.

"Dark Spirit N00bslayerzx12 has invaded."

The three contemplated this strange new message as a fearsome monster rose before them. The most noticeable thing about him was his odd mask. It was white, and seemed to be the face of a crying woman. He wore strange blue robes with golden hemming. In his left hand, he held a pyromancy hand, and he held a menacing rapier in his right. He spoke not a word, but his dark red phantom skin was threatening enough. Not about to allow this strange invader to stop his fun, the white knight ran forward, swinging his broadsword like a maniac. His attacks seemed to be connecting, but nothing was happening. Confused, the knight backed away. Suddenly, the red phantom opened his hand up and a huge flame popped out. It was impressive, but completely missed. Or so they thought…

From all the way across the room, the knight was blasted off of his feet and consumed in fire. He survived, but barely. Without any warning, the black phantom began shifting his positions in impossible ways. He would seem to walk one way, then immediately teleport back a few steps and then be moving a completely different direction. The human pyromancer only needed to watch a little bit, before he sprinted down the stairs in fear of this strange, physics defying enemy. As he saw the phantom pull out a shield, the wanderer sprinted forward, slicing through the enemy. Through some miracle of connection, I mean nature, the hit connected.

Even though he shoved his sword directly through the back of the phantom, almost zero damage was done. The phantom stood back up, almost completely undamaged, and sprinted toward the Pyromancer who was running away toward his bonfire. The knight chased after the phantom, and shoved his sword into his back like the wanderer did. Again, no damage was dealt. The knight only had a second or two to be confused before the phantom was off the floor, and shoving his rapier into the knight. The wanderer has tried to make sense of what he saw, but it still was impossible. As the phantom fell to the ground, he vanished, reappearing behind the knight. The wanderer felt like running, but he remembered the helpless little pyromancer had run away, and was all alone.

The wanderer sprinted at full speed, stepping over the bodies of fallen undead, before reaching the entrance to the bonfire room, which was blocked by an ominous fog wall. He only had time to see the phantom teleport behind the pyromancer and shove his rapier through his back. Falling to his knees in despair, the wanderer cursed the phantom out loud, shouting all sorts of profanities. Suddenly, as if his darkest dreams had been realized, the phantom was behind him too. He watched in horror as the pointy rapier tip popped through his chest, sealing his fate. As he faded back into his own world, he watched in horror as the phantom threw his arms up, and leaned back, as if he was attempting to ignite a fiery rage.

"GOD **** LAGGING PIECE OF ****!" The player screams as he quickly types out a ferocious bit of hate mail before sending it to that little ***** N00bslayerzx12. He threw his controller at the ground, only picking it back up again to read the reply to his message. Feeling the rage boiling up inside him, he launched his controller from his hand, striking the fragile HD TV screen directly on the spot where the words, "U Mad Bro?" were typed out so smugly.


End file.
